Chess

        I’ve started to play chess again. It had been years since I last played any serious games and I’m making an effort to get back into playing form. I one point in time, I was an active member in the US Chess Federation and actually attended several tournaments. Though, those 12 year olds can be tough.

        I am making stupid, stupid mistakes. I’m playing mostly blitz chess to feed the habit, which really doesn’t lend itself to proper study or practice. But I have noticed some changes in my play.

        Just as I’ve lost a step or two to age, the same on the chessboard. I’ve lost several won positions on time, just because I wasn’t processing the info as quick. And in these quick games, the clock is part of the strategy. It can be used as a weapon as much as a knight or a rook.

        In other games, luck can be a major or minor factor. From dice games that are almost all luck to board games that encourage strategy, but still have a random element such as drawing cards, most have a beginner’s luck factor in which even a novice player can get lucky and beat an experienced player. Not so in chess.

        When you lose in chess, YOU lose in chess. Not the roll of the dice, not drawing bad cards, and not some random factor that didn’t go your way. In chess, YOU make the decisions and YOU move the pieces. When you get beat, the other player was simply better than you. Period.

        There are different ways to lose, too. I mentioned losing on time. Sometimes it feels like a cheap way to lose, “man, I HAD him, I just needed more time.” Well sport, that IS the part of the game and you just got outplayed.

        There are silly, stupid beginner traps that can catch you. Most experienced players know the opening ones by heart and do not fall for them. I’ve forgotten several and I am now taking a refresher course at the expense of my ego. As you play more, you recognize them being set-up and learn how to counteract them and put yourself in a better position. When an opponent catches me with one, I feel like I just took a hot sheet pan out of the oven with an oven mitt, took the mitt off, and then touched the tray. IDIOT!

        In the endgame, when there are only kings, pawns, and a minor piece or two left on the board, the player with a better grasp of endgame theory can often beat the opponent with a material advantage but lessor endgame skill. That hurts too. You look at the board and wonder how the fuck you lost. It’s like losing a close scoring game, I’d rather get blown out than know one slightly better move on my part and I could have won it.

        But when you win… What a great feeling. You BEAT him. Especially when they are higher ranked than yourself. There is no bad bounce, no favorable call by the referee, just out and out better playing on your part and you took them downtown! Maybe they made a mistake or you made a brilliant sacrifice, in either case, for a moment you were in one on one combat and came out on top. For a moment, you are top dog. Then the next game comes and you lose your rook to a bishop pin you forgot about and you’re right back to thinking a chimpanzee could beat you.

        I’m off to seek that euphoria of victory. I hope the chimps are asleep.